"Can I be direct with you?"
I’m going to be direct with you tonight.
I’ve been thinking a ton about my mom lately because we are coming up on the twelfth anniversary of her passing. She died of breast cancer at only 56 years old.
About a year before she passed away, she was going to be starting chemo and knew that meant losing her hair. I went with her to the hairdresser. Better to go short and lose less, she was thinking, so she was ready to chop it all off. But when we were there, my mom got a spark of inspiration. She had always wanted to have purple hair.
Now, if you knew my mom when I was a kid, dying her hair purple would not have been in the realm of possibility. We lived in a conservative neighborhood where the women were perfectly put together all the time. Perfection was the name of the game. I mean, what would the neighborhood ladies have said if she came home with purple hair? But when she was facing the unknowns of cancer and chemotherapy, something shifted in her. It’s like she woke up to herself, finally, and said fuck it. She dyed her hair purple.
Some of my best memories of my mom are during that time. She was raw and open, she went after what she wanted and didn’t care about what anyone thought. She was fully herself. And she was awesome.
I felt like for the first time in my life, I finally saw who my mom truly was. It was as if the cancer created the space she needed to just let go and be her wild tender self.
But the sad thing is, it took facing her death to give her permission to start living fully. I learned from her, in that last year of her life, that I didn’t want to wait. If there was something I wanted, if there was something my heart was calling me to do, then I was going after it… now.
As women we tend to hang in the sidelines of our own lives. We fold into ourselves, get quiet, and live for others. We yearn for something different, to hear our own voice, to follow our soul’s passion, to stand up for ourselves in relationships, to write, to dream, to get up off the couch and become our own authority.
But we don’t enough make space for ourselves.
And when opportunities arise to help us get there, we often recognize them but tell ourselves “not now.” Maybe when the kids are older. Maybe when I’m not so busy. Maybe when I lose some weight. Maybe when….
So here’s the thing… It’s time to finally create space for yourself this year. There is no more time. The time is now.
This Monday, January 7th, I want to invite you on a FREE + LIVE 5-Day Guided Journey with me, called Creating Space.
It is a journey of sisterhood, exploration, and transformation. It’s for women who want to make a change in their lives and are ready to say fuck it. It’s for women who want to feel held and want to find a new path of courage. It’s for women who need space.
I’d be honored to walk beside you on this journey. Will you join us?
And if you already know you want to go even deeper in this new year, I have several offerings coming up to take you on a deep dive into yourself. Scroll down for all the details.
Michelle Long, MA
Founder of The Practice®